My kids don't like to clean. Big surprise right? However, when 4 people, a cat and a dog share a space less than 1000 sq ft, it needs to be done often. What takes one person an hour takes three people 20 minutes. In theory.
I am a list maker. It partially fills my need to procrastinate, but it partially keeps me organized. Today I had the girls help me make the to do list thinking that maybe it would draw them in. It partially worked. What I mean is that because my 11 year old was giving me such a hard time about cleaning, the 13 year old totally took advantage of the opportunity to suck up. Sometimes having two kids is such a joy! So the 13 year old checked the various rooms and we came up with a list of things to do. Since she was helpful, she got to pick first which immediately sent up a stream of "It's not fair! She always gets to pick first!" which is far from truth, but don't tell that to the self martyred preteen.
The funniest part was that the one who complained the most was finished first. The apartment is back in order and it really did take no time at all. Don't tell the 11 year old that. She is still absolutely positive that 20 minutes of cleaning ruined her entire day. I guess she will be more than happy to go back to school next week.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
I have been married for 14 years
Technically, that happened yesterday, but I go in spurts with my blogging. My goal this year is to manage a post at least 3 days a week. Anyway....
I have been with my husband longer than I have been without him. We started dating in 1995. When we met I was a 15 year old sophomore in high school. Oh, and I was dating his best friend. Things didn't work out between the friend and I (obviously) but I spent hours on the phone talking to Tom. On Halloween of 1995, he asked me to be his girlfriend. That was 16 years ago this last halloween.
We dated through drama with his family. We dated through him leaving for boot camp (USMC). We broke up twice over stupid shit while he was in NC but we always came back together. We were engaged by that point. He had asked me to marry him before he left, in August of 1996. I was not yet 16. The plan was we would get married in October of 1998 after I turned 18. Then it was moved back to June of 1998 when I graduated high school.
In November of 1997, I managed to talk my parents into signing consent for us to get married in December of 1997. I was still planning on staying at "home" until graduation, but frankly, married marines make more money, and we were hoping to save up some money for a place to live. We had been dating 2 years at that point and my parents loved him, so they said yes.
So December 27, 1997 I married my best friend. We got married in this teeny tiny chapel with just my parents, my siblings and my grandmother present. I wore my mother's wedding dress, which was too big and pinned down the side, and carried silk flowers that we picked up and threw together. Tom wore his uniform right down to his BCGs (or birth control glasses for those unfamiliar). He didn't have his blues yet. Little Bell Chapel provided the music, the decorations, and of course the ceremony. It was beautiful and lovely.
I have been with my husband longer than I have been without him. We started dating in 1995. When we met I was a 15 year old sophomore in high school. Oh, and I was dating his best friend. Things didn't work out between the friend and I (obviously) but I spent hours on the phone talking to Tom. On Halloween of 1995, he asked me to be his girlfriend. That was 16 years ago this last halloween.
We dated through drama with his family. We dated through him leaving for boot camp (USMC). We broke up twice over stupid shit while he was in NC but we always came back together. We were engaged by that point. He had asked me to marry him before he left, in August of 1996. I was not yet 16. The plan was we would get married in October of 1998 after I turned 18. Then it was moved back to June of 1998 when I graduated high school.
In November of 1997, I managed to talk my parents into signing consent for us to get married in December of 1997. I was still planning on staying at "home" until graduation, but frankly, married marines make more money, and we were hoping to save up some money for a place to live. We had been dating 2 years at that point and my parents loved him, so they said yes.
So December 27, 1997 I married my best friend. We got married in this teeny tiny chapel with just my parents, my siblings and my grandmother present. I wore my mother's wedding dress, which was too big and pinned down the side, and carried silk flowers that we picked up and threw together. Tom wore his uniform right down to his BCGs (or birth control glasses for those unfamiliar). He didn't have his blues yet. Little Bell Chapel provided the music, the decorations, and of course the ceremony. It was beautiful and lovely.
Despite what people most often ask when they find out that I got married at 17, no I was not pregnant. My oldest daughter was legitimately a honeymoon baby. I don't really care so much if people get knocked up before marriage, but I hate the idea that people assume my wedding was a shotgun wedding. Do the math. We married in late December. The kid was born at the end of September. I am guessing New Years conception LOL. I didn't even get a positive pg test until Feb.
So happy anniversary to my husband and my baby-daddy <3 I still love him so completely. We spent our 14th anniversary eating chili and watching the Red Wings come from behind and kick St. Louis's ass on TV. We are both huge hockey fans. That, my friends, is one of many things I like about him.
Saturday, December 24, 2011
I have a sickness
I don't know if anyone else shares this, but it's a shopping addiction without spending any money. No, I am not talking about a five finger discount. I go to various websites and fill my cart with various items that I will probably never actually buy.
It goes farther than that. This post tonight is brought to you by a total kitchen redesign of a house that not only do I not own, but one I have not actually seen in person. It's ridiculous! All new appliances, counters, cabinets, the works. This is not the only time I do this.
Every time my period is late (which since I hit my 30s is nearly every month), I start putting together entire nurseries, carseats, clothes and the whole nine yards. Then I close the browser and lament over the hour (or hours *paranoia*) that I wasted on such a silly thing. This baby factory has been shut down for nearly 12 years now. The chance of me having another baby NOW? Not likely.
So now you know my dirty little secret. My name is Jennifer and I am a shopaholic. Luckily for my husband, I am enough in my senses that I don't actually spend any money. For his sake, I hope dementia skips me in my old age.
It goes farther than that. This post tonight is brought to you by a total kitchen redesign of a house that not only do I not own, but one I have not actually seen in person. It's ridiculous! All new appliances, counters, cabinets, the works. This is not the only time I do this.
Every time my period is late (which since I hit my 30s is nearly every month), I start putting together entire nurseries, carseats, clothes and the whole nine yards. Then I close the browser and lament over the hour (or hours *paranoia*) that I wasted on such a silly thing. This baby factory has been shut down for nearly 12 years now. The chance of me having another baby NOW? Not likely.
So now you know my dirty little secret. My name is Jennifer and I am a shopaholic. Luckily for my husband, I am enough in my senses that I don't actually spend any money. For his sake, I hope dementia skips me in my old age.
Friday, December 23, 2011
I am the mother of a teenager
I don't know why it didn't hit me back when she turned 13 in September. The day was pleasant enough, and included the obligatory cake and presents but it didn't really sink in. Then today, while drifting back into memory lane with really old music that my husband was going through, it occurred to me that my oldest child is less than two years from being the same age I was when I started dating my husband. That effectively killed the very nice wine buzz I had going.
For now, I am just going to be happy that she is young for her age, and hope for a few more years before she even starts thinking about dating, much less about marriage!
For now, I am just going to be happy that she is young for her age, and hope for a few more years before she even starts thinking about dating, much less about marriage!
Why do I have to wait?
Patience is not a quality that I have. I do not like to wait for anything. Right now, I am house hunting. That means I have to wait for my realtor to be free to show me the houses. I have to wait for my husband to have been working his new position (he got a promotion this month!!) for 30 days. I have to wait for our tax return...oh yes. I am going to use our tax return as a down payment. It has been nothing but wait, wait, wait.
It's frustrating! I am so ready to be out of this apartment. We have been here almost 2 years, and will likely have to go month to month when our lease expires at the end of Feb. It's not a bad place. It is infinitely better than Hell House. Hell House is what I call the place we were living in before the apartment. It is a long, drama filled story that deserves its own post one day. However, at least at Hell House we had awesome neighbors and a yard. This place...well...
1. It's on the third floor. That gets really old, really quickly.
2. We live next door to the man I call "Angry Santa". He is an older, portly gentleman with a balding head and a long white beard. He could easily pass for Santa if he wasn't always scowling. He is a bit of a dick. His favorite past-times include coughing loud enough to hear through my walls, banging on said walls when I vacuum (in the middle of the day WTF?), and taking up the entire stairwell when he comes and goes.
3. We live across from the Harley riders who like to yell "Shut the f*ck up" when someone knocks on my door. Awesome.
4. It is always hot. We have not had to turn on the heat once since we have been here. In fact, I tend to keep the windows open. That includes in the middle of winter. We live in Michigan. That isn't normal. I think this goes back to being on the third floor.
So back to house hunting. We waited until my husband got the promotion before we started seriously looking. We didn't really WANT to move but the plan was that if he was not promoted by the time I graduated (which should be within the next month if I quit procrastinating and finish my final class) then I would look for a teaching job wherever I could get one. Luckily, it didn't come to that. The girls can stay in their school. I don't mind subbing until something permanent comes along.
So far I have one house that I love. It has every feature I want. The only downside is that it has active train tracks that literally run right behind the backyard. It isn't a huge deal. One went by when we were there and it wasn't much louder than Hell House that was 1/2 a mile down the road from the tracks. However, if we choose to sell one day, I don't think that is going to be on the positive side of things.
I looked at a house today that was halfway between the town we live in, and the town my husband works in. It was a nice idea. The outside looked nice enough, and the pictures on the internet showed a house that wasn't as nice as the one I love so far, but looked ok, and it was $22,000 less. Yeah. There is a reason for that.
Can I offer a suggestion to those trying to sell a house? The smell of cat pee is not a selling point. If you have 4+ cats, you need a way to control the odors they emit. The whole house reeked. I tried not to let that deter me. There are ways of getting rid of cat pee smell...
But add in the house needed all new walls (plaster and every single one was cracked, broken, or in disrepair), new floors (they would have been nice wood floors had they not been wavy), insulation, and windows. The kitchen also badly needed updating. The bedrooms were tiny. I was simply not impressed. They would have to come down at least $15,000 more to make it worth it, and even then, I am not convinced I want to deal with the amount of work it needs. My 11 year old, who went with me, made it pretty clear that the other house was way better. I don't think she was basing that only on the fact that the other one had a pool.
So I am back in the waiting game. I have 6 more houses to look at next week. I am waiting for the new paychecks to start rolling in. I have to wait for the W2s to make their way here. Wait, wait, wait.
I hate waiting.
It's frustrating! I am so ready to be out of this apartment. We have been here almost 2 years, and will likely have to go month to month when our lease expires at the end of Feb. It's not a bad place. It is infinitely better than Hell House. Hell House is what I call the place we were living in before the apartment. It is a long, drama filled story that deserves its own post one day. However, at least at Hell House we had awesome neighbors and a yard. This place...well...
1. It's on the third floor. That gets really old, really quickly.
2. We live next door to the man I call "Angry Santa". He is an older, portly gentleman with a balding head and a long white beard. He could easily pass for Santa if he wasn't always scowling. He is a bit of a dick. His favorite past-times include coughing loud enough to hear through my walls, banging on said walls when I vacuum (in the middle of the day WTF?), and taking up the entire stairwell when he comes and goes.
3. We live across from the Harley riders who like to yell "Shut the f*ck up" when someone knocks on my door. Awesome.
4. It is always hot. We have not had to turn on the heat once since we have been here. In fact, I tend to keep the windows open. That includes in the middle of winter. We live in Michigan. That isn't normal. I think this goes back to being on the third floor.
So back to house hunting. We waited until my husband got the promotion before we started seriously looking. We didn't really WANT to move but the plan was that if he was not promoted by the time I graduated (which should be within the next month if I quit procrastinating and finish my final class) then I would look for a teaching job wherever I could get one. Luckily, it didn't come to that. The girls can stay in their school. I don't mind subbing until something permanent comes along.
So far I have one house that I love. It has every feature I want. The only downside is that it has active train tracks that literally run right behind the backyard. It isn't a huge deal. One went by when we were there and it wasn't much louder than Hell House that was 1/2 a mile down the road from the tracks. However, if we choose to sell one day, I don't think that is going to be on the positive side of things.
I looked at a house today that was halfway between the town we live in, and the town my husband works in. It was a nice idea. The outside looked nice enough, and the pictures on the internet showed a house that wasn't as nice as the one I love so far, but looked ok, and it was $22,000 less. Yeah. There is a reason for that.
Can I offer a suggestion to those trying to sell a house? The smell of cat pee is not a selling point. If you have 4+ cats, you need a way to control the odors they emit. The whole house reeked. I tried not to let that deter me. There are ways of getting rid of cat pee smell...
But add in the house needed all new walls (plaster and every single one was cracked, broken, or in disrepair), new floors (they would have been nice wood floors had they not been wavy), insulation, and windows. The kitchen also badly needed updating. The bedrooms were tiny. I was simply not impressed. They would have to come down at least $15,000 more to make it worth it, and even then, I am not convinced I want to deal with the amount of work it needs. My 11 year old, who went with me, made it pretty clear that the other house was way better. I don't think she was basing that only on the fact that the other one had a pool.
So I am back in the waiting game. I have 6 more houses to look at next week. I am waiting for the new paychecks to start rolling in. I have to wait for the W2s to make their way here. Wait, wait, wait.
I hate waiting.
Thursday, December 22, 2011
My forgotten introduction
How absolutely rude of me ;)
I am always unsure how much information to put into an introduction post. Do you need my whole life story? Skip to the funny parts? The crazy parts?
I have been reading through various mommy blogs and noticed that 99% of them are written by the moms of itty bitty kids. I get that. It's such a sweet time of innocence and funny and partly a time of complete and total frustration. With that said, my kiddos are much older. I have an 11 year old who thinks she is going on 20. She has the total teen attitude locked on. She is also the sweetest, most generous kid, particularly when her sister is being a pill. She has totally mastered the art of sucking up.
The other kid is a newly designated teenager. She turned 13 in September, is in her final year of middle school and is so much fun...most of the time. She also is on the autism spectrum. She is high functioning. She will live on her own one day and she enjoys a lot of what other kids her age enjoy. I try to remember that when I get frustrated with her ever-expanding littlest pet shop collection that I keep hoping she will outgrow. I try to keep in mind how lucky I am when dealing with IEPs and getting her through her homework, and more importantly, trying to help her organize enough that she actually turns it in. She is an absolutely amazing artist with an extreme love of cats (she wants to be a cat breeder someday...oh yes...my daughter the future crazy cat lady) and dragons.
I am also a substitute teacher working on getting my certification to teach high school science. I just finished up my student teaching, and I had an absolute blast. I LOVE working with high schoolers. They are funny and sarcastic and endearing, and most importantly, not bouncing off the walls. After spending several years working daycare, working with teenagers is a total breath of fresh air. They can be moody and frustrating, sure. However, they are absolutely my favorite age group.
Please remind me of that once in a while...
I am always unsure how much information to put into an introduction post. Do you need my whole life story? Skip to the funny parts? The crazy parts?
I have been reading through various mommy blogs and noticed that 99% of them are written by the moms of itty bitty kids. I get that. It's such a sweet time of innocence and funny and partly a time of complete and total frustration. With that said, my kiddos are much older. I have an 11 year old who thinks she is going on 20. She has the total teen attitude locked on. She is also the sweetest, most generous kid, particularly when her sister is being a pill. She has totally mastered the art of sucking up.
The other kid is a newly designated teenager. She turned 13 in September, is in her final year of middle school and is so much fun...most of the time. She also is on the autism spectrum. She is high functioning. She will live on her own one day and she enjoys a lot of what other kids her age enjoy. I try to remember that when I get frustrated with her ever-expanding littlest pet shop collection that I keep hoping she will outgrow. I try to keep in mind how lucky I am when dealing with IEPs and getting her through her homework, and more importantly, trying to help her organize enough that she actually turns it in. She is an absolutely amazing artist with an extreme love of cats (she wants to be a cat breeder someday...oh yes...my daughter the future crazy cat lady) and dragons.
I am also a substitute teacher working on getting my certification to teach high school science. I just finished up my student teaching, and I had an absolute blast. I LOVE working with high schoolers. They are funny and sarcastic and endearing, and most importantly, not bouncing off the walls. After spending several years working daycare, working with teenagers is a total breath of fresh air. They can be moody and frustrating, sure. However, they are absolutely my favorite age group.
Please remind me of that once in a while...
Happy Solstice my friends
I am starting yet another blog. Today is the winter solstice, which seems like a good time for new beginnings.
People are always a little bit confused by my beliefs. I grew up in a very conservative Baptist church. I even attended the church school for a year. Christianity never really fit me. I love the words of Jesus. I think he had some lovely things to say and some great ideas. Unfortunately, it's the rest of the bible I take issue with. As a parent, I cannot fathom casting my kids aside for all eternity for a mistake, and I feel like the proverbial God does just that. Hell never fit into my picture of the afterlife.
When I married my Agnostic husband, I know my father was worried that he would turn my head away from God. What he didn't realize is that first, I am not that impressionable. Second, I was already there. The idea of Christianity quit making sense to me when I reached the age of reason, which was well before I met the man. If anything, my husband shares my beliefs, rather than the other way around.
About four years ago, I did one of those silly religious quizzes which matched up my beliefs closest with Wiccans. I did some research and gave it a try. After a year, I figured out where my beliefs stand.
I am not really a Wiccan. You won't see me calling down the Goddess or trying to catch a fairy. What I believe is a combination of science wrapped up in a huge respect for nature. I think that Magick is the way the ancient people explained what can now be explained by science, and encompasses that which we do not yet have a full understanding.
Do I believe in Magick? Yes and no. Energy flows through the universe. It cannot be created or destroyed. There is a lot that we do not understand about harnessing this energy. I do think people have the ability to tap into this energy and influence it. I believe in the power of prayer. I believe that spells work by the absolute belief that they will work and that it has less to do with what words are said, what candles are used and so on. Every known (and probably unknown) religion has a way of tapping into this energy and I think you absolutely can change things.
With that said, I am not much on spell casting. I still pray but it is less about talking to an all knowing deity and more about putting what I desire out there. Sometimes it works.
Other things I believe: Karma. I am all about the three times rule. Positive energy draws three times the positive energy. Negative draws three times the negative energy. In other words, follow the Golden Rule and you are fine. If you are a dick, you are in for a bad time...maybe not right away but it will come.
This is not going to be a running theme in my blog. I tend to keep my personal beliefs to myself for the most part. Mostly because they tend to make the average person nervous. Just because the "burning times" are over doesn't mean that some of that bad blood isn't still out there. I just wanted to go over it one time so when I do mention the Sabbats or karma or whatever that I have already said my piece on them.
Blessings to you and yours! Have a wonderful holiday season!
People are always a little bit confused by my beliefs. I grew up in a very conservative Baptist church. I even attended the church school for a year. Christianity never really fit me. I love the words of Jesus. I think he had some lovely things to say and some great ideas. Unfortunately, it's the rest of the bible I take issue with. As a parent, I cannot fathom casting my kids aside for all eternity for a mistake, and I feel like the proverbial God does just that. Hell never fit into my picture of the afterlife.
When I married my Agnostic husband, I know my father was worried that he would turn my head away from God. What he didn't realize is that first, I am not that impressionable. Second, I was already there. The idea of Christianity quit making sense to me when I reached the age of reason, which was well before I met the man. If anything, my husband shares my beliefs, rather than the other way around.
About four years ago, I did one of those silly religious quizzes which matched up my beliefs closest with Wiccans. I did some research and gave it a try. After a year, I figured out where my beliefs stand.
I am not really a Wiccan. You won't see me calling down the Goddess or trying to catch a fairy. What I believe is a combination of science wrapped up in a huge respect for nature. I think that Magick is the way the ancient people explained what can now be explained by science, and encompasses that which we do not yet have a full understanding.
Do I believe in Magick? Yes and no. Energy flows through the universe. It cannot be created or destroyed. There is a lot that we do not understand about harnessing this energy. I do think people have the ability to tap into this energy and influence it. I believe in the power of prayer. I believe that spells work by the absolute belief that they will work and that it has less to do with what words are said, what candles are used and so on. Every known (and probably unknown) religion has a way of tapping into this energy and I think you absolutely can change things.
With that said, I am not much on spell casting. I still pray but it is less about talking to an all knowing deity and more about putting what I desire out there. Sometimes it works.
Other things I believe: Karma. I am all about the three times rule. Positive energy draws three times the positive energy. Negative draws three times the negative energy. In other words, follow the Golden Rule and you are fine. If you are a dick, you are in for a bad time...maybe not right away but it will come.
This is not going to be a running theme in my blog. I tend to keep my personal beliefs to myself for the most part. Mostly because they tend to make the average person nervous. Just because the "burning times" are over doesn't mean that some of that bad blood isn't still out there. I just wanted to go over it one time so when I do mention the Sabbats or karma or whatever that I have already said my piece on them.
Blessings to you and yours! Have a wonderful holiday season!
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